Falling to Pieces
by Blondiee Leah
Summary: Originally a one shot. Rose and Jack's life after Titanic is far from perfect. They fight all the time and can't help but feel like they are tearing apart. Has Jack and Rose's love for each other fizzled out?Or can they hold onto that spark they once had?
1. Chapter 1

**So I was just casually reading some fanfics on here when I realised there is nothing really about Rose and Jack having fights. So you know me been different I decided to write a one shot about a particularly nasty fight Rose and Jack have. I found it quite fun to write so I hope you like it and remember to review! **

**Thanks =) **

Jack paused at the door. He reached out to knock before his hand fell back down by his side. It seemed ridiculous really, a twenty year old man wondering if he should enter his own home. It wasn't that he was fearful of entering his house. It was what was inside he was fearful of. He didn't know what kind of mood Rose would be in tonight, they had shared a cold breakfast this morning after another one of their rages, the rages that were beginning to appear more often.

Jack shook his head _Get a grip! _He told himself. Quicker than a flash he reached for the door handle and turned it before stepping inside. The house was in darkness and there was no sound or movement. Jack thought that Rose was probably in bed, he hadn't actually realised how late it had gotten. Not wanting to cause a stir he laid his keys down on the table gently and removed his coat and hat placing them on the stand.

He began to move cautiously across the room when the light snapped on. Jack looked towards the glowing light bulb from the living room lamp. Rose sat on the couch with her back to him, she wore a nightdress with an old cardigan, her fiery curls were pinned back in a low pony tail and her hands were gripped to the couch.

Jack stopped moving and stood still feeling like a naughty child who had stayed out past his curfew.

"You're home a bit late aren't you?" Rose asked coldly still with her back to him she made no attempt to move from her position.

Jack rubbed the back of his head. "Yeah, yeah sorry about that it's been a long day at the office,"

Rose scoffed she turned round and gave him a sharp look. "You mean to tell me you have been at work all this time?"

Jack went on to explain but Rose held her hand up before he even had chance to speak. "You might want to think about what you're going to say before you tell me another lie. I can smell the alcohol on your breath what do you think I am stupid?" Rose said in frustration before standing up.

"Ok so I went for a few drinks with some fella's from work you happy?" Jack said in annoyance putting his hands in his trouser pockets.

"No Jack! No I'm not happy!"

Jack put his hand up to his forehead; this was going to be another long night. "Can we please not do this now?"

Rose folded her arms. "We may as well get it over with!"

"We don't have to argue every night!"

"But we do anyway!"

"God damn it Rose!" Jack shouted pacing up and down his face in his hands. Rose watched whilst her arms remained stiffly folded and her eyes glared at him once filled with love now with fury and hate. She didn't want to argue with him, but she found the slightest things he did would tick her off. His lateness, his laziness, his in ability to show he even cared for her anymore.

"You know what, I'm sick and tired of picking up after you and your shit while you go out and do what you want!" Rose spoke in anger whilst picking up sweaters, books and Jack's sketchpad before throwing them at him.

Jack caught the sweater and dodged as the hardbacks flew in his direction. The sketch pad landed on the floor a few loose pages scattering around it. Jack immediately dropped the sweater and struggled to control his anger.

"Do what I want? I work for you don't I! I support you don't I!"

"And you don't think I don't support you?"

"I never said that!"

"You don't think I don't want to go out sometimes with my friends, shop or go drinking? I stay here all day been the perfect model of a wife, waiting for you to come home something I never wanted to be!" Rose shouted.

"Don't turn this shit on me Rose! You have never been asked if you wanted to go out with your friends, you know why, you know why!" Jack shouted in frustration pointing his finger accusingly at Rose moving even closer towards her.

Rose didn't move her eyes egged him on.

"Because your friends see you for the nasty, stuck up piece of crap you really are!"

Rose howled in laughter. "Do you see yourself? Is that how you get your kicks pointing out the insecurities in my life because you're not man enough to look at the ones in yours!"

"Every time, every single time you make me out to be the bad guy and you to be the victim!"

Rose removed herself from the room.

"Don't you walk away from me! Rose!" Jack shouted, he was too wound up to walk away now. His blood boiled, his skin itched, his head threatened to explode. He charged after Rose.

Rose was pouring a glass of whiskey she downed it in one and slammed the glass on the side.

Jack reached out and turned her round viciously so she was facing him. "I'm not done here," He hissed coldly. Rose put up her hands and pushed him with all her might.

"Well I am," and she walked away.

Jack rested his hand on the refrigerator and shook his head. "Why do you do this Rose? Why do you never want to finish what has been started?"

Rose paused in the doorway before turning round to face him. "I think if you push me anymore tonight, I am going to snap and end up killing you!" Rose said finishing the last sentence in a scream, before turning back into the living room.

Jack's eyes widened in shock, ignoring what she had just said he stormed after her.

"What do you mean you want to kill me? You don't just go around making threats like that what are you mad?" He shouted.

Rose picked up the vase of flowers Jack had bought her just the other day. To say sorry for the fight they had had before. With an angry cry she hurled them at him.

Not giving him much time to react, Jack leapt to the floor and protected his head as the vase hit the wall and glass fell around him. Rose breathed deeply like an angry bull releasing its steam. Jack slowly got up and looked at the mess around him.

"You crazy bitch!" He screamed.

"And this is exactly why I don't want a child!"

"Oh so we're back on that subject now are we?" Jack asked.

"Yes because I can't seem to get it through to you that this is no way a stable environment to raise a child in, just look at us!"

"Stable environment? What are you some kind of therapist? What would you know what a stable environment is?" Jack asked angrily.

"Well this certainly isn't one!"

Jack flew his hands up. "You know what, you're right we shouldn't have a kid, because that would mean I have to touch you, and right now I can't even stand the sight of you!" Jack hissed.

Rose bit back the tears. "Ditto," She finally managed to say.

Jack knew he was pushing it too far. But he couldn't stop Rose just got him so wound up. When they first set up home together and got married it was great. They never argued, they showed love to one another, they were happy. And now they could hardly have a conversation without it turning into an argument. They barely showed love to one another anymore, the only emotion they seemed to express was hate.

Jack had lost count of the number of times he had been sent to the sofa, listening to the sound of Rose's tears. How he couldn't kiss them away because he was the one who had caused them. He couldn't even look at Rose now without further anger beginning to erupt inside him.

"Sometimes I wonder, if it was ever worth saving your arse on that ship," Rose added.

"Yeah well sometimes I wonder why I didn't just walk away from you when I had the chance. I sure wish I had now, I wish when Hockley shot at you, that bullet had never missed,"

Rose gasped her hand flying up to her mouth. Jack had hit an all time low he knew that. He reached out his hand and went to touch her, to apologise for what he had just said. "Rose I'm-,"

Rose snapped her arm away. "Get out!" She screeched.

"Rose please,"

"Get out, get out, get out!" She cried pushing him angrily towards the door. He resisted at first but the thumps got harder.

"You know what fine, I'm gone!" He shouted pulling his coat off the rack and slamming the door. Rose fell against it and slipped down to the floor crying her heart out. She pulled an arm round her legs while she tried to use the other hand to suffocate the sobs. Though it didn't work, she rested her head against the door looking up to the ceiling while the tears fell from her eyes. How she wished times could go back to the way they were. How she wished she didn't have to be alone tonight.

Jack listened to the sobs at the other side of the door, his head resting against it. He swallowed the lump in his throat wishing he could take back every hateful word he had said, wishing he could hold her in his arms, wishing that for once it wasn't him who had caused her the pain. He lifted his head and placed his hand on the door. He managed to push himself away. He wrapped his coat around him tighter before escaping into the cold dark night once again.

**I hope you liked it. It is only meant to be a one shot but I can see it becoming a story, but I'm only going to continue writing it if people want me to so if you want me to make it into a story be sure to tell me so I can start planning. So review and tell me what you think and I may be back with another chapter. **

**Ciao for now! **

**Leah xx**


	2. Chapter 2

**Well the 4 reviews and the PMS have told me to continue this story so I am going to! So here is the second chapter to the renamed story **_**Falling to Pieces. **_**I hope you all like it and remember to review!**

**Leah **

Jack stumbled through the dark and cold street. He knew where he was going, his one friend who always understood what was happening.

He walked down the street, he knew it was late and didn't want to disturb her, but thankfully the lights were still on in the house meaning she hadn't departed to bed yet. Jack yet again paused before reaching out and knocking on the door.

Excited footsteps could be heard from inside, the door was quickly flung open. Ester stood in front of him wearing an elegant purple dress, her blonde hair tied up in a tight bun with a few pieces curled and hung at either side of her face. She wore bright rouge lipstick and lots of powder. Her smile was wide showing off her white teeth. It quickly fell though as it became apparent that it wasn't who she was waiting for.

Ester quickly smiled again but it was much too false and not as big as the one she had before.

"Oh Jack! What a surprise to see you at this time, what are you doing here?" She asked sneakily looking behind him to see if anyone was following close behind. Jack caught her looking and looked over his shoulder into the empty street, before turning back his eyebrow raised.

"Err maybe I should go. I've obviously come at a wrong time, I don't want to intrude," Jack said starting to turn round, but Ester caught his arm.

"Don't be silly Jack, come in," and she opened the door wide open for him, welcoming him into the house.

Jack hesitated before moving inside. He noticed Ester pause at the door looking down the street one last time before bowing her head and closing the door.

"Look Ester I don't want to ruin your night..." Jack began.

Ester shook her head. "Jack if you leave it means I will have to drink all this wine by myself," She smiled picking the bottle up of the table and beginning to open it.

"I'll be right back," She said putting the wine down and going into the kitchen. Jack sat down on the couch taking his hat off his head. He looked round at the candles waiting to be lit and the fire glowing in the corner. It was obvious she had plans tonight and had clearly been blown off. He looked behind him to see what Ester was up to. She pottered around in the kitchen, taking two wine glasses down from the cupboard.

He noticed the table all neatly set up with plates, cutlery, glasses and a candle in the middle. Jack saw her look out the window in the kitchen briefly before coming back into the living room. She smiled sweetly and began pouring a glass of wine before handing it to Jack. She then poured herself a glass and sat down next to him.

There was a silence between them both, while they awkwardly took sips from the glass.

"So what are you doing here? Though I could probably guess," Ester said putting her drink down on the table and leaning her arm on her crossed leg ready to hear what Jack had to say.

Jack looked at her before nodding slowly. "Well it would be fair to say me and Rose haven't really been getting along recently," He said downing the rest of the wine.

Ester was ready to pour him a new glass which he was glad to accept.

"You know I used to feel so free with her. Now I just feel trapped all the time, like nothing I say or do is right anymore. I feel like I'm treading on egg shells, I can't even have a conversation with her at the moment. We pick at each other all the time, over the stupidest things," Jack explained.

"So what did you fall out over this time?" Ester asked taking another sip of her wine.

Jack rubbed his hand over his forehead. "I don't even know that's how ridiculous it is."

Ester shook her head. "I'm trying to make sense of it all. What happened to you both? You guys had one of the best marriages I have ever known."

Jack shrugged. "Maybe that's what did it. We hadn't even known each other a month when we married, in fact we have only been married just over a year and we already have problems. I don't want to lose her, because I love her Ester I really do, but I look at her now and I wonder where the woman who I loved went to." He turned to face Ester who was looking at him with deep concerning eyes, taking in every word he said to her.

"I look at Rose sometimes and you know what I think? I think sometimes I could just kill her with my bare hands. How awful is that?" He choked.

Ester leant over and put a supportive arm over him, while he struggled not to cry. Ester was always there to comfort him through his times of hurt. Truth be told she used to be one of Rose's best friends; she had even been the bridesmaid at their wedding. However Jack ended up spending a lot of time with Ester when she used to come round looking for Rose, who would be out at the theatre.

One of the reasons their relationship seemed to grow apart. Ester was fed up of been blown off by Rose without been told. Of course they still spoke and now it was Ester and Jack who were the close friends.

Ester thought this to be a good time to get some comfort to. She leant her head on Jack's shoulder in despair. "I hate when you get upset like this Jack. You're a great man; there should be more men like you." She sighed.

Jack then took the time to look at her all dressed up and looking beautiful. He knew what had happened but he felt obliged to ask.

"Ester why the effort? What was happening tonight?"

Ester scoffed and sat up. "Isn't it obvious?" She asked.

Jack bowed his head shamefully wishing he hadn't said anything. Ester meanwhile gave a small smile.

"You know, some men can leave a woman hanging while he can do what he wants. A promise is a different definition, a plan can be discontinued without much explanation, and the concept of time is non-existent,"

Jack reached out gently and tucked the curl behind her ear. "I'm sorry Ester. You know you deserve a man who will treat you right. You're a wonderful person,"

Ester felt this warm tingly feeling inside and before she knew it she was leaning towards Jack, his face getting closer and closer. Jack paused for a moment unsure what to do he knew he should move away and go back home to Rose but something told him to stay.

Suddenly her lips were brushing his. Not much persuasion was needed as their lips latched together in a passionate embrace. Jack closed his eyes lost in the moment. Ester gently moved her arms round his neck, while he let his fall to her waist pulling her in closer.

All thoughts of Rose had been cruelly thrown from his head. He gently ran his hand up her thigh while she groaned. Suddenly he realised what he was doing, opening his eyes and seeing the wrong person he pulled away frantically and stood up.

"God damn it!" He exclaimed pacing up and down his hand pressed against his forehead. Ester too was shocked and felt guilt ridden at what had just happened.

She sat up and threw her hand over her mouth disgusted with herself before resting her head in her hands.

"I should go," Jack said softly.

"Jack..." but before Ester had chance to finish Jack was making his way to the door. Ester hurried after him. Jack flung the door open; a drunken man was stood on the doorstep swaying.

"Hey baby!" He drunkenly shouted to Ester. Jack pushed past him and made for the streets.

The man looked at Jack then at Ester confused. Before he had chance to say anything Ester was pushing him out of the doorway.

"Get out!" She shouted.

"Oh come on baby don't be like that give me a smooch," He said puckering up his lips. Ester slapped him hard across the face, before pushing him violently off her doorstep. He fell and tumbled onto the floor.

"Jerk!" She screeched and then slammed the door.

Jack meanwhile ran down the street, hoping to erase everything that just happened. How could he of kissed Ester? How could he have done that to Rose? Sure their relationship was bad at the moment but that was no excuse. She had always been faithful to him.

He took a moment to get his breath back. He rested his hand on the lamppost and leant over, suddenly feeling really ill. He gently sat down on the path looking like a vagrant and tried hard not to cry. He knew he could never tell Rose about this, their marriage would be over for sure.

He noticed two people staggering towards him. One was drunk and sobbing while the other one struggled to hold his friend up.

"How can this be happening? I can't lose her I love her so much," the drunk one sobbed.

"You're going to be ok, everything's going to be fine come on I lets get you back to my place," his friend soothed.

They both walked past him not giving him much notice, Jack watched them continue down the street until they were out of sight.

_That's going to be me one day. _He thought to himself in despair.

Jack sighed and picked himself up off the street and continued his journey home. When he reached his house, he again paused and thought about knocking but decided against it. He then noticed the door was unlocked and he gently slipped the latch, hoping to sneak inside.

He noticed the living room light was still on. Rose lay curled up on the sofa fast asleep. Her hair coming free of the ponytail and her cheeks pale but crusty with dried tears, she had cried herself to sleep again. Jack gently knelt down in front of her and stroked her cheek. He remembered when he used to do this and Rose would reach for his hand in her sleep and cuddle it gently. This time they remained firmly pressed against her chest.

"What went wrong Rose?" He whispered before removing his hand. He moved over to the storage cupboard and pulled out a blanket, laying it gently over her. He thought about kissing her but suddenly decided against it in case he woke her. Jack snapped the light off and departed to bed, hoping that tomorrow everything would magically be ok.

**I hope you liked it. To be truthful it took me ages but I can see this been quite a successful story. So please review because you wanted me to make it into a story, so if you don't review I will just discontinue it, and I always carry out threats haha. You have been warned! :P **

**Leah xx**


	3. Chapter 3

Rose opened her eyes, sunlight filled the apartment. Sitting up she yawned and stretched.

_Was it really morning already? _She thought to herself. Memories of last night flooded into her mind. There was one thing Rose liked about mornings, the fact that just for a few moments she could forget the arguments ever happened, pretend that everything was ok. As she tried to stand up pain winced through her neck and back.

"Ouch," She mumbled as she dragged herself off the uncomfortable couch. She pulled her cardigan round herself tighter and ran a hand through her messy hair, which was falling from its pony tail. Rose went into the kitchen to get a glass of water. She leant against the counter and stared into the back yard. Birds skipped around collecting twigs from the ground and fluttering back up to the tree.

Rose closed her eyes and breathed deeply.

_Jack came behind her and wrapped his arms round her waist, resting his chin on her shoulder and kissing her neck. _

"_You're so beautiful," He whispered. _

Rose opened her eyes and put her hand on her neck where she could still feel the imaginary touch. Rose could feel the ghostly presence of Jack's hand round her waist. Back in the day, they couldn't keep their hands off each other and now it was like they were strangers.

She remembered when Jack first started his job; he would leave little notes around the apartment when he was gone. Telling Rose how much he loved and missed her. He didn't do that anymore. Rose picked at the thread on her cardigan; she hated being stuck here by herself. Cleaning up after Jack, trying to make the perfect home, even though there relationship was nowhere near perfect, not anymore anyway.

Rose smoothed the cushions on the couch, before going into the bedroom. The bed had been made, like Jack hadn't even slept in it. She knew he had come home, because she didn't remember putting a blanket over herself and his jacket was hanging up this morning. Rose stroked her hand over his pillow. She couldn't help but pick it up and held it close to her chest; she inhaled deeply before falling back onto the mattress.

"_Good morning my angel," Jack smiled, stroking her cheek. _

"_I miss you Jack," She said sadly. "I miss how things were," _

"_Hey, don't say that we're going to be fine," Jack smiled. _

Rose was snapped back into the present, the familiar anger began to bubble up through her body again. She was tired of moping around all day, feeling sorry for herself while Jack would be at work with his friends, having a laugh no doubt going to the pub afterwards.

Rose stood up and got dressed. She didn't want to stay in the house today; she hated it staring at the same four walls day in day out. She would go see Ester; she hadn't paid a visit to her in a while. She flung on her coat and left the house.

As Rose walked down the street, she couldn't help but feel glum. She could never feel as terrible as what she did under her mother and Cal's control, but it was getting close to that. Jack and her they just fought all the time and she could feel herself beginning to snap one day.

Rose looked up at the clouds in the sky. _Why can't things just go back to how they were? _Rose thought to herself. She didn't see the person in front of her and next thing she knew she was on the floor.

"I do apologise Miss, here let me help you up. Are you ok?" The gentlemen asked holding out his hand to her. Rose let herself be pulled up.

"I should be the one apologising to you. It was me who wasn't paying attention," Rose explained brushing herself down.

"Well you did seem to have your head in the clouds. Or your eyes on them should I say," The man chuckled. Rose forced a smile back, before erupting into small giggles herself. She never had a chance to look at the man properly but he was quite handsome, probably middle class. He didn't seem too snobby, dark hair blue eyes. Nothing compared to Jack's ocean blue diamonds.

"I'm Joseph Calvert," He smiled holding out his hand.

Rose shook it. "Rose Dawson,"

"Well Rose it was nice to bump into you," He chuckled again.

"Quite the comedian," Rose smiled.

"I like to think so. Well I must be going I'll maybe see your round sometime,"

"Yes maybe,"

He turned and began to walk away, but for some reason Rose couldn't continue walking nor cast her stare from him until he vanished.

She blinked and smiled to herself before continuing down the road to Ester's house. She was surprised she still knew the way after so long. She made her way up the stairs and knocked on the door. Her heart was racing, Ester was supposed to be her friend but she hadn't really been a great friend to her in the past and she didn't think Ester would be so happy to welcome her back with open arms.

The door flung open, and Ester gasped. Thoughts of guilt and anxiety spread through her like wild fire. After what had happened last night, it was just typical that Rose would show up.

"R-rose what are you doing here?" Ester asked.

Rose shrugged. "I guess I just felt that I should try and make amends."

_You're not the only one. _Ester thought to herself.

"Come in can I get you a drink or something?" Ester asked, closing the door behind her.

"A tea?" Rose questioned.

Ester nodded. "I'll be right back just sit down,"

Ester practically ran to the kitchen and shut the door behind her. She put her head in her hands and began to shake. This could not be happening, what happened last night had been playing on her mind. She felt guilty, sick and shaken. Jack and Rose were supposed to be her friends and she tried it on with him. A married man! She couldn't stay in a room for an hour or so with Rose and pretend like nothing had happened.

"Ester are you ok?" Rose called from the living room.

"Yeah I'm fine," Ester managed to splutter out, and she began to make the teas, her hands were shaking so much it was a wonder she didn't spill anything.

She carefully handed the cup to Rose and sat down in the chair opposite the couch.

"It's been too long Ester," Rose smiled.

Ester just nodded, unsure what to say or do. She just wanted to get out of here.

"I mean I know, I wasn't always the greatest of friends to you but I am really sorry and I do want to try and get back to how we were," Rose tried to explain.

"Yeah," Ester simply said taking a sip of her tea.

"Ester are you still mad with me?"

"No of course not, you needed to focus on your acting I understand that." She said. "I'm sorry Rose, I really am," the words erupting from her mouth.

Rose looked at her confused. "Why are you apologising,"

_Because I kissed your husband. _"Because I didn't try and stop us growing apart," Ester quickly lied.

"Well there's nothing to stop us been close again,"

"I know about you and Jack Rose. I know the problems you're having,"

Rose paused. Her expression suddenly turned. "How do you know that?"

"Because Jack's my friend to and every time you row he comes here, and I can't pretend that it hasn't been happening more and more frequently."

"Jack shouldn't be telling you these things, it's none of your business," Rose snapped.

"He's hurting; he's a broken man..." Ester began to explain.

Rose scoffed and stood up. "And I'm not hurting? Am I not a broken woman? I'm fed up of him always playing the victim in all this shit! Everybody defends him but he's no angel!"

"Rose I'm not saying you're the bad one, I'm not saying that he's the victim! You guys have got to talk and sort this shit out, before it gets any worse. So he doesn't have to come to me anymore, so he doesn't have to end up doing any more things he will regret..." and then she realised what she said.

"What do you anymore things he will regret? What's he done?" Rose asked, though she already had a faint idea.

"Nothing just nothing ok," Ester said lowering her head.

There was a deafening silence and an awkward tension building in the room.

"Ester, please tell me,"

Ester couldn't keep it a secret it was too hard. "Jack came round last night. After your fight and he got really upset, so I tried to comfort him and we, we, we ended up kissing," She blurted out.

Rose gasped, she felt like she had just been hit across the face.

"But it meant nothing! And nothing else happened I swear to you,"

Rose stepped back towards the door. She flung it open and left, stumbling down the stairs and sobbing as she went. She knew things were bad, but she didn't for one moment think Jack would ever be unfaithful to her. Ester was supposed to be her friend.

Rose fell against a lamppost; sobbing uncontrollably she fell to the floor. A familiar hand reached out to her. It was Joseph.

"You look like you could do with a drink," He said with concern.

Rose nodded tears spilling down her face. He pulled her up for the second time that day, he patted her arm and she felt grateful, grateful that there was someone there to pick her back, although she wondered how long it would be before she crumbled altogether.

**Hope you liked it, reviews are very much appreciated (: **

**Leah **


	4. Chapter 4

**Another chapter, bit disappointed that I only got two for the last one. Please remember to review; you don't know how much motivation it gives. **

**Thanks to my reviews anyway though! **

Jack sat at his desk, running a hand over his pounding forehead. God how he hated this job, and the rich morons he worked for. He hadn't had much choice in the matter, drawing pictures wasn't going to be enough to keep a stable home and a roof over their heads. He tapped the desk as he read over the report. See he worked in an industry business but he pretty much employed to do the things the bosses couldn't be bothered to do.

He couldn't concentrate. He hadn't spoken to Rose since last night after their argument. She was still fast asleep on the couch when he was about to go to work. He didn't want to wake her though, he knew better of that. It would probably of only sparked another argument. He didn't think he deserved her, not when they first met and certainly not now. She cried every night, was she really that unhappy? He didn't want to make her sad. He wanted things to go back to how they were, but he didn't know how to make that happen.

Before leaving he considered leaving her a note. Like he used to, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He couldn't pretend everything was ok when it clearly wasn't. Last night was evidence of that when he kissed Ester. Ester! She was supposed to be his friend. The fact of the matter is he liked it. More guilt spilled through him.

"Dawson have you read that report yet?" Mr Thomas asked appearing at his door.

"Not yet Sir, I will send it over to you when I'm done,"

"Get a move on will you!" and he left the room.

Jack clenched his fists. Did they not seem to realise how long it took to read 400 pages on random shit, that he didn't even care about? He crumpled the report in his hand before throwing it across the room and letting out an angry cry. He put his head in his hands; he didn't want to live like this anymore. He couldn't live like this anymore. He promised he wouldn't end up like his parents ended up on their death beds practically hating each other.

An idea popped into his mind. He could make things better, he could show Rose how much he cared about her. How much he still loved her. He wouldn't tell her about Ester, hopefully that could remain a secret forever. He could just go on pretending nothing happened.

Jack calmly walked over to the corner where the report lay and picked it up. He smoothed its corners trying to get rid of the creases and went back over to his desk and began to read again. Everything was going to go right for a change.

000

Joseph and Rose sat in a little cafe; they sat in awkward silence while Rose cradled her tea in her hand looking down. She felt an idiot crying in front of someone she didn't even know and yet here she was drinking tea with a man she had met briefly once after bumping into him and the street.

"Are you ok now?" Joseph asked breaking the awkward silence between them both.

Rose gave a small smile and nodded, sniffing.

"You shouldn't ever let yourself get that upset. You're too nice,"

Rose scoffed. "You don't even know me,"

Joseph shrugged. "I can tell these things,"

"Oh," Rose said.

She was beginning to think this was a mistake agreeing to go with him. She didn't know him, and it was clear it was an awkward situation for both of them. She wasn't likely to open up to him with all her problems. Why would she put that on someone, when it was none of their business?

Joseph didn't pursue the conversation. He was a clever man, if she wanted to talk she would. He wouldn't push her into talking to him because that would never work. Instead he picked up his cup of tea and took a big gulp.

"How were you there?" Rose questioned.

"Huh?"

"Well you said you had to go on your way, but then you were there to pick me up,"

"I was on my way home. I didn't think we would bump into each other again." Joseph explained.

"That makes sense," Rose said.

"Yeah don't worry I wasn't stalking you," He laughed.

"Won't somebody be wondering where you are?"

"No, I'm widowed. My wife and I never had the chance to have children,"

"Oh I'm sorry," Rose said feeling bad.

"Don't worry about it. What about you surely you have a family to go home to,"

Rose's face dropped. "My husband will still be at work I imagine," She said sadly.

"Have I hit a raw nerve?" Joseph asked.

Rose felt this sudden urge to tell him everything. It built up from her stomach up to her throat before she blew it out. "Me and my husband have done nothing but argue for the past few weeks and we barely even talk to each other anymore without it turning into another argument. Then today I found out he kissed someone who is supposed to be my friend!" Rose burst out putting her head in her arms.

Joseph reached out and patted her shoulder gently. "I can't say much about that Rose, but no man should ever cheat on his wife."

"You don't say," She replied.

It was then she realised how much of a fool she was been, what was she still doing here moping about it? She picked up her coat and threw it on.

"I have to go," She said.

"Oh really, well can I possibly see you again sometime?" He asked carefully.

Rose paused before nodding. "Thank you for the tea," she said and ran out of the door.

000

Jack was just putting the finishing touches to the table. He was cooking Rose and meal and hopefully they could talk about their problems and sort it out. He knew it would take a while, but maybe they could get back to normal.

He lit the candles on the table and smiled. He could hear the door knob turning and his heart began to beat.

Rose walked through the door, and stopped. She stared at the table her arms dropping.

Jack gave a small smile. "Hello Rose, I thought you know we could have some dinner and talk,"

Rose didn't say anything. She walked to the table; she paused before lifting her arm and sweeping all the items off the table in anger. Plates smashed to the floor, the flowers spilled and Jack stared shocked at his perfect table remnants on the floor.

"Rose," Jack simply said. Too shocked to say anything else.

"Don't you dare! Don't you dare Jack Dawson! You think you can win your way round by cooking a dinner and we talk! Like everything is going to be ok!"Rose screamed.

"Rose, I want to sort this out because I love you! Why won't you cooperate a little?"

"Because I know what you did!" She paused. "Ester Jack, Ester," Rose said tears welling up in her eyes.

Jack put his hands over his mouth. "Rose you gotta believe me. It meant nothing. I was angry, I was confused..." Jack tried to explain.

"Oh save it Jack," Rose said and she walked into the bedroom.

"Rose, Rose please listen to me," Jack pleaded following her, but the door was slammed in his face.

He sighed staring at the blank door. He put his head against it before slipping down and sitting on the floor.

Rose bit her lip; she wandered to the window and stared out into the night sky. Silent tears rolled down her cheek.

"I don't want to be sad anymore," She whispered to herself. She stood up onto the window sill and fiddled with the latch, flinging the window open. The breeze rushed through the room making Rose shiver. She shuffled to the edge hanging on tight.

"_I'm flying Jack!" _

**Hope you liked it so much that you will review and make me happy (: Much more to come! I promise an update soon!**

**Leah **


	5. Chapter 5

**Managed to squeeze in another update! Updates will start cooling off again for a bit, because I'm in my final weeks of college and that means EXAMS! So will only be able to squeeze updates in when I have the time really, but I will do my best (:**

**Thanks to AddyD90, Leo Me Enamoraste, anon, Blue-Eyed Artist's Girl, titaniclover91, volleyballgirl122 and Racheldaninja! For your kind reviews, they mean so much. **

Rose shuffled further towards the edge. Her eyes firmly shut, what she was doing was madness complete madness. She knew that deep down she knew it, but the pain was getting too much to bear. She let out a deep ragged breath. Her grip loosened on the side of the window when a voice rang out in her ears.

"_Don't do it,"_

Rose gasped and snapped her eyes open. Her body shook violently as she forced herself off the window and back into the bedroom. She slammed against the wall, her body shaking so much she couldn't stand. She put her hand over her mouth and slid down the wall, sitting on the floor. The tears flowed down her cheeks. She choked and panicked; her breathing deep and quick. Rose slammed the back of her head against the wall again and again, until blood began to appear on the spot. She kept doing it until the pain began to make her feel dizzy.

"_You're so stupid Rose! Why did you do that? Why?" _Jack's voice continued in her ear.

"I don't know! I don't know why ok?" Rose shouted to herself, burying her head in her hands.

The open window let in a cool, spooky breeze as it ran down Rose's neck. She managed to stand up and slammed the window shut. She couldn't help but fall against it and look down onto a happy couple walking hand in hand on the street below.

"_You jump, I jump," _

A small knock was heard at the door.

"Rose please talk to me," Jack's voice cried out. Rose bit her lip. More sobs broke out, and before she realised what she was doing, she ran to the door and flung it open. Jack sat against it, surprised by Rose's sudden change of heart he stared up at the broken woman in front of him. Rose let out a huge sob, immediately putting her hand over her mouth to try and block it but it was no use.

Her legs gave way, and she crumbled to the floor. Jack pulled his wife over into his arms, and she didn't resist instead she simply buried herself further into the man's arms that felt so distant to herself. How good it felt to be held again. Rose continued to cry as she curled up further so far she was almost invisible. Jack held his broken wife, tears filling up in his eyes as he stroked her hair and planted little kisses on top. It was then he felt the matted section on her head, the blood on his hands as he stared at it in shock.

"Rose what have you done?" He uttered.

"I didn't mean to Jack. I was scared, I've been so lonely," She cried.

Jack gently pulled her head away from his chest and held her face in his hands. He stared into her beautiful emerald eyes and wiped away the tears which continued to spill from them. How could he not of seen the tiredness, the strain, the depression? He hated himself for been selfish.

"Please let me back in Rose," He said, pressing his head against hers. "Please," He whispered.

Rose's shaking hands moved to his face; she ran her hands down his smooth cheeks. The touch she longed for, that she had missed so much. Jack gently pulled her onto his lap and held her close. Scared of losing her, he missed her been close.

"I don't think I can do this anymore Jack," Rose said.

Jack's heart began to break; he could feel it shattering inside his body. "Don't say that Rose, don't do this to me."

"What if we were never meant to be? You could be happy with someone else,"

"No I couldn't, I can't imagine being with anybody else but you. What happened with Ester, I really mean it when I say it was a huge mistake on both halves. We both regretted it straight away."

"Why didn't you tell me Jack?"

"I was scared. I felt guilty; I wanted to get things back on track. I don't want to lose you," He said trying to grasp her hand.

Rose was filled with uncertainty. She moved off Jack's lap and sat next to him, both leaning against the wall.

"What happened to you jump I jump Rose?" Jack asked.

Rose played with her fingers, and pressed her head against the wall. He had a point, they said they would always stick together through the bad and good times, even if there have been more bad then good at the moment.

"I don't know Jack, sometimes I feel like I'm falling alone,"

Rose stood up and walked away into the living room, the mass destruction of her earlier outburst still on the floor. Shame, guilt and sadness began to move through her body, something she hadn't experienced when she did it. She knelt down on the floor and began to pick up the broken pieces of crockery.

"I will do that Rose, don't hurt yourself," Jack said after following her.

She ran her hand over the floor and picked up the rose, the only thing left undamaged. She carefully ran her finger over the soft flower, staring at it intensely.

Jack watched her, unsure what to do what to say. They had shared intimacy before, but now she was beginning to distance herself again. He didn't know how to reach out to her, how to show her he cared. How to show that everything was going to work out like the last time things were hard.

The rose reminded her of what could have been, but isn't. Especially the tragedy that occurred only a year ago, that still taunted her everyday and started the arguments, even though something like that is supposed to bring people close together.

Rose stood up with the rose in her hand. She turned to face Jack and began to walk towards him.

"I'm sorry I can't give you children Jack," Rose whispered to him before going back into bedroom and closing the door. Once behind closed door, she lay on the bed with her arms wrapped around her flat stomach and sighed deeply. She didn't want to hurt Jack, she wanted to be there for him, but how could she do that when she was constantly hurting herself.

000

Jack let what Rose said to him register. It was a sore subject what happened that day. He still couldn't bring himself to think about it even now.

He wished Rose would open up to him more, he wished he could make everything better. Sometimes it was best to just leave it alone, pushing Rose never worked it just made her resent him even more.

He cleared the mess away; trying to clear away the horrific memory was awful. He could feel Rose slipping away from him further and further. He was literally gripping on by his finger tips.

"Shit," He said as a piece of glass cut his finger and blood specks appeared. He looked at the dried blood from Rose's head still on his hand. He was worried about her, the last time he was this scared was after the incident.

She wouldn't eat, talk, or sleep. She would lay in bed all day not doing anything, not responding to him. Like she had disappeared from him.

He didn't want that to happen again. He loved her god he loved her so much. So why did he insist on hurting her. Leaving her alone day and night while he worked and went to the pub, it wasn't fair. He knew though that he wasn't all to blame for the mess.

He poured the broken crockery into the bin. Before making his way into the bedroom, Rose lay facing him with her eyes shut. He didn't know if she was asleep or not. He made his way over and climbed into the side next to her and wrapped his arms round her body holding her close, he rested his face on the nape of her neck and breathed in her scent.

Rose opened her eyes, but didn't indicate that she was awake.

"I can make you happy Rose, I promise. Everything is gonna be ok," He whispered softly into her hair. Tears began to well up in Rose's eyes, she didn't respond. After five or ten minutes Jack's breathing deepened and his grip on her loosened.

"I hope so Jack," She whispered. "I really do,"

**Hope you liked it! Remember to review. I'm really getting into this story if any of you have any ideas about further chapters be sure to mention them to me! It'll help a lot and I promise I will give credit, just can feel myself slipping into writers block and I don't want to go down that route again! **

**So yeah remember to review and share any ideas. **

**Thanks a lot (: **

**Leah **


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you for all the positive reviews! It means a lot **

Rose awoke the following morning alone. She sat up curiously, with the sheets ruffled on the side next to her. She could remember last night Jack's arms round her, how awkward she felt, how guilty it made her. She ran a hand through her cottered hair and yawned. Just where was Jack? It was Saturday so he wasn't at work.

Rose sniffed, and could smell bacon sizzling. She slid out of bed and wrapped her dressing gown round her tightly before making for the door. She opened it and looked into the living room of the apartment, the smell and sizzling sound was more intense here and she followed the whiff into the kitchen. Jack stood with his back to her buttering some bread. She played with her fingers awkwardly not sure how to let her presence be known.

"Morning," She finally announced.

Jack turned around and smiled widely.

"Did you sleep well?" He asked.

Rose nodded before sitting down on the chair and crossing her legs pulling the paper into her sight. She flipped the pages over, not really interested in any of the news she was pretending to read. Jack sighed and turned to continue cooking the breakfast, when his eyes were no longer on her Rose looked up sadly. She couldn't just go on pretending like everything was ok after all the fights they had been having.

Jack placed the bacon on the slice of bread and followed it up. Things still felt cold between them. He didn't know what he could do. He handed the sandwich to her and she gave a small smile.

"Thanks," She said softly.

Jack sat in the chair opposite her and watched as she nibbled at the sandwich before tearing off pieces and putting them in her mouth.

"What?" Rose asked with a mouthful of food.

Jack smiled. "Nothing," He said and began eating his own breakfast.

There was an awkward silence between them both as they continued to eat their breakfasts. Rose finished first and delicately pushed the plate away from her and leant back in her chair licking her fingers.

"When are things going to go back to normal Rose?" Jack asked breaking the silence.

"I don't know what you mean," Rose replied turning her face away from his stare.

"Come on you know exactly what I mean. Nothing has ever been right since-,"

"No Jack!" Rose interrupted him.

"It's ok to talk about it," Jack said trying to reassure her.

"I don't want to!" Rose shouted standing up and beginning to walk away.

"So that's what you're going to do again huh Rose? Because that's all you do all the time. Running away from your problems won't solve them. I just wish you could talk to me,"

Tears fell down Rose's cheek. "I try to Jack, I really do but it's too hard. You just don't understand,"

This angered Jack. He felt his blood boiling and he clenched his fists together trying to stay in control. The urge was too much. He slammed his fists on the table and stood up his chair falling behind him.

"I don't understand huh! I don't understand are you fricking serious!" Jack yelled, making Rose jump in the process.

"She was my child to Rose, but I never got the chance to grieve because I was too busy looking after you, day in day out. Holding you while you cried, watching you slip away from me, just like she did. Yet you have the cheek to turn around and say that I don't understand!"

Rose put her face in her hands. "I didn't mean it like that, it's just you're ready to get up and move on and I'm not, ok I'm just not," Rose said softly.

Jack's face fell from the stern, angry rage and he immediately began making his way over to Rose. He took her hands gently before resting his hands on her face. "You know what the doctor said. With the cold water and the stress and anxiety afterwards she wouldn't have lived anyway," Jack said trying to reassure her.

"She wouldn't have lived anyway? She was still our child!"

Jack didn't reply.

"She's still dead," Rose muttered.

Jack's hand fell from her face, and she slowly moved away. "I don't want to talk about it anymore," She walked back into the bedroom and closed the door. Jack sat back down at the table with the dirty breakfast plates around him. He wished Rose would talk to him more. He couldn't deny that the majority of the problems had started with the miscarriage.

"_Rose I'm home!" Jack shouted closing the door, he walked into the bedroom to find Rose looking in the mirror smiling at the little bump. Jack leant against the door and couldn't help but smile as Rose ran a hand over her stomach. _

"_Hey," Jack said softly. Rose turned around. _

"_Hi," _

_Jack made his way over to her and wrapped his arms round her, resting his hands over hers on her stomach and kissing her neck gently. _

"_I can't believe I'm only sixteen weeks gone. I really want our little child here now," Rose said. _

_Jack laughed. "Patience Rose, she will be here in five months. We're almost half way,"_

"_She?" Rose questioned turning round to face Jack. _

"_Oh I know we are going to have a little girl. I can just tell," _

_Rose ran her hand down his cheek and kissed him on the lips gently. She believed in all her heart that her and Jack were going to be the best parents possible, and their child would be loved and cherished. She hoped it would inherit Jack's gorgeous blue eyes and his artist talent. _

_Jack hoped she would inherit Rose's personality and her fiery spirit. _

_Later that day Rose was lying on the bed trying to get cool. The weather had been really hot that summer, and the sweat was pouring off her, but Rose's face grew flushed and sweat began to pour off her. _

_Rose gasped as a sharp pain shot through her stomach. She winced and sat up as another pain went through her stomach. Suddenly moistness began to trickle down Rose's leg. _

_Her heart began to pound. As she reached down, and felt the thick substance. She shakily lifted her hand up to her face and sobbed as redness covered it. _

"_Jack!" Rose screamed in agony. "Jack!" She screamed again. _

_Something wasn't right, she knew it wasn't right. Jack hearing the tortured screams from the kitchen ran as fast as he could to the bedroom. He flung open the door and stopped in his tracks as he saw Rose, pale yet sweaty. Her dress and bed sheets soaked with blood, and fear in her eyes. _

"_I think something is wrong with the baby," She sobbed. _

_000_

_Jack sat in the hospital waiting room his hands clenched together. He couldn't believe what was happening, the baby was gone. The baby they had both looked forward to was dead. He ran his hands down his face wiping away the tears. _

"_Excuse me Mr Dawson," The doctor said. _

_Jack immediately stood up to face the man who had been battling to save Rose. _

"_Your wife has lost a massive amount of blood, but we've managed to stop the bleed. She's going to be ok," _

"_Oh thank god," Jack said grateful that he hadn't lost both his wife and baby. _

"_I am really sorry about the loss of your little girl. These things happen all the time, it's a wonder your baby survived for as long as it did in the womb, with the Titanic incident and the stress and anxiety followed. Right now your wife will need the emotional support as a miscarriage can be a very traumatic experience for a woman," The doctor explained. _

_Jack nodded. He was going to make sure that Rose would get through this, "Can I see her now?" _

_The doctor nodded and led Jack into the room. Rose was laying back, her red curls spilled on the pillow and her face turned away from him. He rested his hand on hers. _

"_Hey," He whispered. _

_Rose turned to look at him, her face still pale and tear stained. "Jack," She croaked. _

_Jack sat up on the bed next to her. "How are you feeling?" _

"_Like horseshit," _

_Jack forced a smile and stared at her in sadness. She gulped. "You were right Jack," _

_Jack stroked her face slightly confused. "What do you mean?" _

"_It was a little girl," Rose said before bursting into tears. _

_Jack quickly held her in his arms and she sobbed uncontrollably. Jack wept as he rocked her back and forth tears pouring from his eyes. _

"_We'll be ok Rose, it's gonna be ok,"_

Rose appeared from the bedroom, dressed and her hair up in a loose bun. "I'm going to town do you want anything?" She asked.

Jack shook his head.

"Ok I guess I'll see you later then," She pulled her bag off the side and walked out of the apartment.

Jack sighed and began to clear away the breakfast plates. He hoped one day Rose would finally have the courage to talk to him about it.

Rose walked quickly down the street. She walked into the familiar cafe she had visited yesterday with Joseph. Sitting down she ordered a coffee and sat quietly, she didn't know why she had come here it was all a bit strange. She tried to pretend that it wasn't to do with Joseph but she knew deep down she couldn't deny how interested she was in him.

As if by magic Joseph appeared at the cafe door and walked in. He noticed Rose sat at a table alone and he couldn't stop his heart jumping for joy. He made his way over to her,

"Hello Rose," He smiled.

Rose looked up and a wide grin spread across her face. "Hello Joseph, do you want to sit down?"

"Sure," He replied pulling the seat out opposite her.

"What brings you here?" He asked.

Rose shrugged. "It does good coffee," She lied. "What about you?"

"Well I guess I hoped to meet the mysterious girl again who rushed off so quickly yesterday. I just hope I hadn't scared her off,"

Rose blushed slightly. "I don't think you did,"

Joseph grinned and the pair broke out into deep conversation, as if they had known each other for ages.

**Hope you liked it remember to review! (:**


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